Breaking news reports out of Syria indicate that the movie-star child-addict duo Angeline Jolie and Brad Pitt are planning to adopt an Arab child into their brood, which would bring to a baker's half dozen the number of rugrats in the family.
The megastars were recently spotted in Syria visiting Iraqi refugees on what was deemed a humanitarian mission, in that Ms Jolie and Mr Pitt bear some resemblance to actual humans.
There are estimated to be over a million Iraqi refugees in Syria, most of whom made a dangerous journey across desert and mountain to flee violence in their home country. (Brangelina also made a harrowing journey, forced to ride business class on Royal Jordanian rather than fly in their own private jet.)
Humanitarian relief efforts for refugees in Syria have fallen way short of adequate, says an Amnesty International report, and the government of Syria is encouraging refugees to accept relocation programs to ease the burden on the country.
But Brangelina are taking relief work to the next level: by relieving Syria of a Syrian, there will be room for one more Iraqi. "Every little bit helps," said Ms Jolie, after attending a state dinner with Syrian president Bashar al-Assad, who according to rumours told the actress that she could have the "pick of the litter," so long as "Brad films his next movie here."
While Ms Jolie is reportedly thrilled to add another photoshopable face to her multi-million-dollar family album, Mr Pitt is believed to have reservations about adding another mouth to understand. According to a thoroughly fact-checked story in Britain's OK! magazine, Mr Pitt is preparing for a showdown with his oft-estranged wife over further additions to their "rainbow family."
Therefore, that lucky Syrian boy or girl, whoever it is, may not be packing for a life of excess, neglect, top-of-the-line psychoanalysis, Reality-TV hosting and tell-all-book writing just yet.
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